Individual Therapy

When parents call me asking if I can meet with their child, I usually ask whose idea it was to reach out to a therapist. In most cases, it is the parent who has come up with the idea and is directly or indirectly “encouraging” the child to go to the sessions. I have learned from working with children who don’t want to see a therapist that these sessions are not very productive. Psychotherapy is a process that requires the client to be ready and willing to share what is happening in their lives. It is not a process that can be brought upon someone if they are not ready, even if they are an adult. I don’t believe that “forcing therapy” on a child who is suffering and who does not want therapy is the best course of action for the child. It further makes the child feel that nobody understands them. As mentioned in the “Preferred Treatment” section, for this type of client, I provide parent coaching without ever meeting the child.

There are some children, some of them quite young, who want to speak to a therapist. In these cases, I meet with the child as it is obvious that they have the emotional and intellectual sophistication to share their thoughts and feelings. For these clients, I find ways to involve their parents, initially by inviting them to sessions with the child or offering parent coaching. I have found that these are the best type of cases because the child usually reveals dynamics unknown to the parents, and through a combination of individual sessions with the child, parent coaching sessions, and sessions between the parents and the child, the issues are quickly resolved. These children usually end up contacting me at different points of their development for additional support.

Sometimes the children of my parent-coaching clients, the ones who were not ready to meet with me and whom I had never met, want to work with me when they are adolescents or young adults. This is another path to individual therapy for young clients.